Last updated on January 27th, 2024 at 01:44 pm
Tochi and I had seen every day after the last issue we had. Our good times were really good. Every relationship had its issues and I was sure this was just one of the issues. Cheating was definitely a deal breaker for me but Tochi wasn’t cheating. I was not proud to say that I’d checked his phone more than once and saw nothing. He just refused to admit his problems because of his male ego.
***
“How are we going to handle not seeing each other as often as we are used to?” Tochi asked. We were on one of our strolls and would both be leaving school in two days. The next time we would see would be during our convocation and we might not even be able to attend depending on the date. I had been expecting him to ask this question as I did not want to be the one to bring it up and as usual, come off as if I was the only that cared.
“Honestly, babe, I don’t know how that will happen. How do we plan to see each other? How do we plan to maintain our relationship and issues?”
“We just have to make it work. We need to also be more patient, especially you,” He said playfully shoving me. We both laughed as he continued, “We definitely have to spend more on calls and trips to see each other. How often can we see each other in the whole year?”
“Babe, I swear I don’t know. We should have talked before choosing these states.”
“True, but we are young and we deserve to explore, to serve where we desire. I don’t expect you to serve in Lagos just because I am in Lagos, same for me.” It was true, what he said. But we could have chosen states that were not so far from each other; committed relationships require compromises here and there.
“What’s the goal of our relationship?” I asked without even thinking.
“To get married at some point, obviously not now or in five years but that’s the goal,” Tochi said all the right things but in a twisted way. I would have appreciated him asking when I would be ready. In five years, I would almost be twenty-five, I didn’t know if I would be ready then, not that it was too young to get married. He’d be twenty-six by then, not too young.
“Tochi, the distance between Abuja and Lagos is about ten hours. We can’t afford to fly if we want to see each other often, so how do we go about it? We still have to think about what happens after service; do I move to Lagos or what?”
“Angel, I might be settling down in Lagos after service. My service year is intended for networking and for my career to take off. But we can face that later. How often can you visit Lagos?”
“Why do I have to be the one to visit?” I looked at him.
“We will both visit na, but I might be more busy than you. I just told you of my plans. Also, I am more flexible than you, if I miss you too much, I can just show up at your place without announcing.”
“Well, I might say I can visit once in two months and stuff happens. I also have plans for my service year.”
“So, once in two months right?”
“Yes.”
“We can work with that. We can switch, you visit now and I do the next visit.” Tochi studied Fine Arts and he was really into his work but him already saying he would be very busy sounded off-putting. If I had never seen another busy guy, I would think it had to be this rigid. But I won’t be comparing him with Joe, I made my decision, there was no need.
“So, what of this year? If we go to serve in October, this is just August, Convocation might be in September or November, how do we handle it?”
“Well, you can’t visit me in my parents’ house, neither can I in yours’. Also Enugu to Jos is far. We just have to make it to the Convocation. What do you think?” Oh, my opinion counts! I was a bit upset but I needed things to sail smoothly in these remaining days with him. It tore my heart apart every time it occurred to me that we wouldn’t be able to see as often. Tochi was also very bad with calls, how do we handle that aspect?
“Yeah, we have to make it for the Convocation. Once we settle into our new states, we can then plan the first visit.”
“Deal, mama.” He pulled me to him and we hugged.
***
I couldn’t help but cry. I buried my face in my arms as I cried. It was not just that I was going to miss him, it was because I was uncertain of what this separation meant for us. I loved Tochi and the feeling was mutual but I was scared, if history had shown anything, it was that we didn’t handle distance well.
“Aunty, shift.” The new passenger said even though she had shifted me already. I adjusted and kept my face glued between my arms on the headrest before me. I was on the bus and Tochi had just left my park to his park where he would get a bus to Jos. It was the first time he would be following me to the park—it made it even harder for me. I was going to miss him a whole lot. I took out my phone and texted him.
I miss you already. Within some minutes he replied.
You don’t know what I’m going through here. I don’t know how I am going to cope without you, my love. I burst into tears when I read his message. I disliked this and still believed we could have made this transition easier. My dad’s call came in and I silenced my phone, he’d be worried if he heard my voice.
***
Once we moved, I called my dad and Zabby to inform them. At least home was doing very fine; my parents had just returned from a vacation and Zabby just returned from visiting her friends in Lagos. I then sent Tochi a message as well, he replied immediately saying they had also moved. Given his prompt response, I reckoned we were off to a good start.
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