Last updated on April 29th, 2023 at 05:22 am
“Lape, are you saying I should not even have a feel of you without a condom again? Am I not your husband again? I cannot understand this new rule.”
“Jude, should I get the IUD and ditch the condoms?”
“We agreed not to do that.”
“We also agreed that it’s on the basis of you using condoms and me breastfeeding Daniel till he is eighteen months, what changed?
Jude had been hounding me since he got to know that I got a whole box of condoms, asking all sorts of questions. I was on the verge of telling him the real reason I wanted to have protected sex. He would not understand anyway.
“But I am your husband, it feels as if you are denying me my marital rights.” Jude is claiming marital rights, if only I could start to rant about how he had deprived me of my marital rights too.
***
I loved the smell of Christmas. When I was younger it was really a big deal for me. Now that I was married, the excitement was just personal—Jude wouldn’t even get a Christmas tree.
As of this time last year, I had just one child and now I had two children. And that’s all, please. Dimeji would be two in a few days and apart from cooking him something nice and baking him cake, there was nothing more. I remembered Jude and mummy insisting on marking his first birthday last year. ]
I had concluded that I would sell t-shirts with different inscriptions on them and some joined or taped with Ankara. The decision seemed smart and easy since Sarah’s company did bulk production of the shirts. I could always order the designs I wanted and she’d keep them. She was also going to help with the delivery since her company also did deliveries. As we agreed, I would pay her after every five deliveries.
All I had to do was to go there and count the shirts she made after placing my requests as well as choosing the Ankara print I want. I also had to get the pictures so I could display them online. I was hopeful but realistic enough to know that the first three months might be dry.
Everything was in place and I had managed to save some extra money too. The only logical reason I was stalling was because of my fear—of Jude… and failing. But I was committed to it already and Vic would not let me rest. Sarah also kept subtly pushing me.
***
It was Christmas Eve. I liked Christmas; I really enjoyed the atmosphere and the ease that came with it. I disliked that we have to cook so much on Christmas though, all of the day would be used to serve meals and cater to people, and in the long run you’d be tired barely having any fun. If everyone pulled their weight and served one another, then it could be fun. I spent one Christmas holiday at Vic’s family house and that was when I saw that there was actually a better way to enjoy the holiday. We got extra hands to cook and sat down to gist as we ate all sorts. After eating we all sat in the sitting room and watched a movie. I only woke up when Vic’s grandfather woke me up to go inside to sleep. It was a different holiday for me.
Jude had told me that his friends would be here tomorrow and I had gone to the market to get things with the money he gave me. I had to start preparing some things from tonight. I wish I had friends to cook with, like a friends’ hang out. That must be so much fun. Now I was with two kids, watching out for them and doing all this cooking alone.
***
I just had my bath; I needed to look and feel good today. I took my time and applied makeup to my face. There was no time to make my hair but I combed through the full length and wore my dress, a wine gown that Vic sent me. Even my kids would be surprised to see their mother looking this way. I know I looked good and it made me feel better.
Before I had my kids and started getting distracted with managing my home, I used to dress and put a lot into my appearance. Vic also made sure I looked my best, she would never let me rest looking anyhow. I had a lot of men asking me out and it was a good time, no problems or responsibility on my shoulders.
***
By late afternoon, Jude’s friends started coming in and thankfully, my kids had slept off. It was a surprise, but a good one. I started serving them food while Jude served them chilled drinks. Soon the house became loud and music blared from the speakers. Everyone was eating and talking. The atmosphere was light also. I forgot that I was a mother for a while.
Soon we were dancing. It did not escape my notice that some of Jude’s friends came with their girlfriends rather than their wives. Some of the women joined me in the kitchen to serve and clean up a bit. We all laughed as the men told jokes. I decided not to worry or think about Faith. I did not know Jude got this many drinks, about three crates were soon filled with empty bottles, apart from the spirits and wines as well.
I imagined their typical Saturday was similar to this and shook that thought off again. Just this once, let me enjoy myself with my husband and his friends. I knew Jude’s friends were already feeling tipsy. I also drank two bottles, but that was it. I did not exceed my capacity. I hoped no one misbehaved or even puked. I started clearing some potentially harmful things around.
“Jude, why Faith no come? She dey the shop you open for am?” One of his friends asked, obviously drunk than the others and loud-mouthed on a normal day. I looked at Jude and he was looking at him sternly. I doubt the guy understood anything or he was probably that drunk.
“Why you dey look me? Person dey always gum to your body, I no see am now, I dey ask.” One of Jude’s friends got up and helped this friend out under the guise of him needing cool air. The whole sitting room was quiet. I had tried hard to not think about Faith and his drunk friend helped me remember her. I had tried to be the cool wife since I knew about Faith, but I didn’t think I had it in me and this had revealed it.
“Lape, please pass me one drink there.” Another friend asked. I considered hissing and going inside, but I smiled and got up to give him the drink. Soon everyone started partying and Jude kept avoiding my face till the party ended.
***
The house was as quiet as a library now. All of Jude’s friends had left including the loud-mouthed one. I just put the kids to bed considering that they woke up at some point in the party and instead of leaving the house a mess till the next day, I faced the mess. Hopefully, I could sleep and have a good rest tonight. I considered asking Jude about what his friend said, but Jude would lie about it. There was no point to it.
I would check his phone when he slept. That’s more like it. I was already one of those women who constantly looked through their husband’s phone. He was still watching TV in the sitting room so I had to keep busy till he went to sleep. I could not stop my heart from beating fast in anticipation of what I might see this time.
