Last updated on October 17th, 2025 at 09:22 am
It’s been a while since our last trip to the house, Zabby and me’s first road trip together. The stress of adulthood has successfully emptied my full tank from that particular trip. Still, I have no regrets, and the memories still leave me feeling just as excited as the trip made me. Thankfully, we got home without any issues and in good time.
—
I’m on my way home after a hectic day at work, as I reflect on the conversation I had with my mum at home. It was fun at home even though we didn’t stay for long—we left early on Sunday, and I almost didn’t want to leave. Life just seemed to pause; everything seemed still and fun and peaceful.
“Angela, the year’s coming to an end. How about our last discussion?” My mum asked. Zabby had just gone to see her parents, who also live in Enugu.
“You want me to bring home another man?” I asked plainly, as I munched on the failed attempt at Samosas that we made. It was my first time trying it and no other person in the house had any useful tips. It was such a hassle to get even five decent pieces. Unsurprisingly, I was left to eat them alone.
“Well, you never really brought one home, but that’s not what I’m saying. It’s not always about men men men, you know?” My mum answered, leaning on the freezer in the kitchen. I nodded as I picked another Samosa, in this case Angiemosa. But for the shape, it tasted good. “Angie, I’m asking a question.” My mum nudged.
“Oh, I didn’t know. What did you ask?” I drop the half-eaten Angiemosa to give my mum full attention.
“Have you considered that you’re really young and life isn’t always about men?”
“I don’t think I understand this. I shouldn’t bring a man home?”
“Angieee,” My mum groaned, shaking her head. For some reason, it made me laugh.
“Explain na.”
“Okay. What are your plans for like the next five years?”
“Umm, take care of Eliam.”
“That’s it? But your father and I are taking care of him already.” She said, spreading her palms.
“Well, I’m grateful for that, but he’s my responsibility. If I didn’t get pregnant, he wouldn’t be here.”
“I know. We know. Even at that, we’re actually happy that he’s here. I know that the situation surrounding his birth wasn’t the most ideal, but we’re happy he’s in our lives.” She answered, pensive. “So, his father, Tochi, hasn’t called you?”
“Nope,” I shook my head. “Not in over a year, and I’m grateful for that. Eliam and I, even you and daddy, can do without that stress.”
“I understand and love that you’re very calm with how it all turned out. So, what I was trying to say is that don’t forget to enjoy your youth. I’m not saying that you should intentionally make unfavourable decisions, but I mean that you shouldn’t be scared or let fear overcome you as you approach different aspects of life. Life can be fun if we make it so.”
—
Zabby’s gone out for a little influencer event here in Abuja, so I have the luxury to think. Not that I can’t do it when she’s around but I’d have to be in my room, unlike the privacy I presently have to zone out on the couch in the sitting room without any concerned interference. It’s only a few months to the end of the year, and the conversation I had with my mum has stayed with me. It’s no lie that I’ve lived a major part of my young adult years waiting on a man, feeling the shame of an unwanted pregnancy and being a young mother—just refusing to live.
It’s high time that changed. It’s time for me to think of my values and the things that bring me joy. I’ve learnt that fulfilment doesn’t have to come from a man or from certain achievements. It’s also fine if I’m odd or if I make mistakes or choose a different path. Maybe a journal can help. I get up from the couch, grab my purse and head for the nearest stationery store.
